I am moody, blunt, outspoken, and a bit on the (good/fun) crazy side. I have an extremely fucked up sense of humor, and an aversion to giving a shit, sweating the small stuff, or letting trivial shit get to me. I don’t go out of my way to hurt others, but I sure as fuck won’t walk on eggshells just because they’re sensitive twats. I do get sad, angry and hurt… Only because at times, I care about people who don’t deserve it. I’ve learned to walk away from them for good. And, if I ever look back, it’s just to remind myself to not make the same mistakes when similar situations present themselves. At times, I expect too much from people… The rest of the time, I expect nothing from them, and give too much of myself. I’ve loved, I’ve cried, I’ve laughed… But I’ve never really hated. To me, it is better to just keep going than wasting energy on stupidity. Selfish? Perhaps. This is my one and only life, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to waste it. Many don’t approve… Maybe some day I’ll care. I’ve made mistakes, and I’m looking forward to a thousand more. When I’m in my deathbed, I’ll be able to honestly say that I lived!! I lived MY life for me and those few I care about. I’ll have regrets, and accomplishments. I’m ok with that.

I’ve had enough!! I’m tired, fucking exhausted. There’s no point in trying to find what isn’t there. I’ve tried dating, relationships, marriage, friends with benefits and booty calls. None ever work!! For some fucked up reason I never get what I want/need/deserve. Perhaps, I’m asking for too much. So what? I’m not asking for anything I’m not already willing, able and capable of bringing myself, and I’ll be damned if I’ll ever settle in order to not be alone!! I’d rather be “alone” by society’s fucked up standards, than settle and feel lonely, empty, and like important things are lacking/missing!!

1. Budweiser beer conditions your hair.
2. Pam cooking spray will dry finger nail polish.
3. Cool-whip will condition your hair in 15 minutes.
4. Mayonnaise will KILL LICE, it also conditions your hair.
5. Elmer’s Glue: Paint it on your face, allow it to dry, peel off, and see the dead skin and blackheads (if any) disappear.
6. Shiny Hair: Use brewed Lipton Tea.
7. Sunburn: Empty a large jar of Nestea into your bath water.
8. Minor burn: Colgate or Crest toothpaste.
9. Burn your tongue? Put sugar on it!
10. Arthritis? WD-40 Spray and rub in the area. It also kills insect stings.
11. Bee stings: Meat tenderizer.
12. Chigger bite: Preparation H.
13. Puffy eyes: Preparation H.
14. Paper cut: Use crazy glue or ChapStick (glue is used instead of stitches at most hospitals).
15. Stinky feet: Use Jell-O!
16. Athletes feet: Use cornstarch.
17. Fungus on toenails or fingernails: Use Vicks vapor rub.
18. Kool-Aid can be used to clean dishwasher pipes. Just put it in the detergent section and run a cycle. It will also clean a toilet. (Wow, and we drink this stuff)
19. Kool-Aid can be used as a dye in paint. Put Kool-Aid in Dannon plain yogurt and use as finger paint, your kids will love it and it won’t hurt them if they eat it!
20. Peanut butter: Will get scratches out of CD’s! Wipe off with a coffee filter paper.
21. Sticking bicycle chain? Use Pam no-stick cooking spray.
22. Pam will also remove paint, and grease from your hands! Keep a can in your garage for your hubby.
23. Peanut butter will remove ink from the face of dolls.
24. When the doll clothes are hard to put on, sprinkle with cornstarch and watch them slide on.
25. Heavy dandruff: Pour vinegar over your scalp!
26. Body paint: Crisco mixed with food coloring. Heat the Crisco in a microwave. Pour it into an empty film container and mix with the food color of your choice!
27. Tie Dye T-shirt: Mix a solution of Kool Aid in a container; tie a rubber band around a section of the T-shirt and soak.
28. Preserving a newspaper clipping: Use a large bottle of club soda and cup of milk of magnesia. Soak for 20 min. and let dry. Your clipping will last many years.
29. A Slinky will hold toast and CD’s!
30. To keep goggles and glasses from fogging, coat with Colgate toothpaste.
31. Wine stains: Pour Morton’s salt onto the stain, and watch the wine absorb into the salt.
32. To remove wax: Cover the stain with a paper towel. Use an iron to gently iron over the wax stain, it will absorb into the towel.
33. Remove labels off glassware etc: Rub with Peanut butter!
34. Baked on food: Fill a container with water. Use a Bounce paper softener sheet. The static from the Bounce sheet will cause the baked on food to adhere to it. Soak overnight. Also, you can use 2 Efferdent tablets and soak overnight!
35. Crayon on the wall: Colgate toothpaste and brush it!
36. Dirty grout: Use Listerine.
37. Stains on clothes: Colgate toothpaste.
38. Grass stains: Use Karo Syrup.
39. Grease Stains: Use Coca Cola, it will also remove grease stains from the driveway overnight. We know it will take erosion from car batteries!
40. Fleas in your carpet? Use “20 Mule Team Borax”. Sprinkle and let stand for 24 hours. Maybe this will work if you get them back again.
41. To keep FRESH FLOWERS longer: Add a little Clorox, or 2 Bayer aspirin, or just use 7-up instead of water.
42. Migraine Headache? Use Gatorade..Powerade won’t work.
43. When you go to buy bread in the grocery store, have you ever wondered which is the freshest (so you ‘squeeze’ for freshness or softness)? Did you know that bread is delivered fresh to the stores five days a week? Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Each day has a different color twist tie.

They are:
Monday = Blue,
Tuesday = Green,
Thursday = Red
Friday = White
Saturday = Yellow.

So if today were Thursday, you would want red twist tie; not white which is Fridays (almost a week old)! The colors go alphabetically by color Blue- Green – Red – White – Yellow, Monday through Saturday. Very easy to remember. I thought this was interesting. I looked in the grocery store and the bread wrappers DO have different twist ties, and even the ones with the plastic clips have different colors. You learn something new everyday! Enjoy fresh bread when you buy bread with the right color on the day you are shopping.

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