watermarked-DSC00245    Welcome to my Den. My name is Lucy Fuhr, and this is my online home. I’m blunt, outspoken, and honest. I don’t go out of my way to offend people, but I don’t walk on eggshells to try not to. If you’re too fucking sensitive to allow a total stranger’s posts and opinions to offend you, I highly suggest crawling back up your mom’s over-stretched twat, as the internet is definitely not the place for you!

   I’m an atheist, not to be confused with a devil worshiper, due to the fact that it is impossible to worship something you don’t believe in. My fiance Mike and I live in cow country (AKA Missouri). Enjoy my posts or feel free to GTFO, because I truly couldn’t give a fuck less about your approval.

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Categories: Funnies, Lucy-isms

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1. Boys will break your heart. Let them. Learn from it.

2. It’s so easy to become jaded, but don’t let it happen to you. Fight it.

3. Stand firm in your beliefs.

4. Love yourself. Sometimes you’re all you have.

5. Cherish the little things.

6. Order pizza at 3am on a Tuesday. It won’t kill you.

7. It’s okay to laugh at yourself. Embrace the imperfections.

8. You are the rule, not the exception. Life will be so much easier if you accept this now.

9. Make mistakes. If you learn from them, they won’t be in vain.

10. He’s lying, there is no fish tank. Go anyway.

11. Classes can be retaken. Life cannot.

12. Sometimes it’s better to ask for forgiveness than for permission.

13. The world is full of cynics – don’t become one.

14. Stop calling him. Stop texting him. If he wanted you, he’d be there.

15. Apologize when you’re wrong. Just suck up your pride and do it.

16. Bellybutton piercings are a bad idea. As are tattoos.

17. No one is perfect. Stop being so hard on yourself.

18. Hug your friends. Cherish them. Hold them tight.

19. Laugh until you cry. Cry until you laugh.

20. Step outside your comfort zone.

21. Order a glass of water with every drink. It’s not lame. It’s smart.

22. A bad hair day really won’t kill you.

23. Dancing on tables should be reserved for special occasions, like birthdays and Thursday nights.

24. Don’t dumb yourself down for a boy.

25. Ignorance is not bliss. Study. Work hard.

26. Life is hard. Accept this and move on.

27. Don’t sweat the small stuff, but do sweat at the gym. Your health is your everything.

28. Tell your parents you love them every chance you get.

29. Stop caring so much about what everyone else thinks.

30. Forgive. Life is too short to be angry.

31. You are destined to be more than just someone’s wife. Act like it.

32. People will hurt you. Don’t stoop to their level.

33. Read a newspaper.

34. Sometimes the only person that you can rely on is yourself.

35. It’s okay if your thighs touch and your tummy isn’t perfectly toned. You’re still beautiful.

36. Don’t let your happiness depend on another person.

37. Push yourself. You’d be amazed at what you’re capable of.

38. Smile through the tears.

39. Don’t slut shame. Girls have it hard enough – don’t turn on one another.

40. It’s okay to ask for help.

41. He’ll never change. Let him go.

42. Trust your instincts.

43. Worrying causes wrinkles and Botox is expensive. Calm down.

44. Take pictures. Lots and lots of pictures.

45. Love with everything you have.

46. Put down your phone and look around. Life is happening.

47. Stand up for yourself.

48. Confidence is everything.

49. Wash your makeup off at night. Seriously. Do it.

50. There are bad people in this world. Don’t be one of them.

51. Be honest with yourself.

52. Be honest with others.

53. You never need that last shot of vodka, but have it anyway.

54. There is a man out there who will not make you cry. Wait for him.

55. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

56. Your success will not be handed to you. Work for it.

57. Don’t waste money on expensive mascaras. Great Lash by Maybelline will always be the best.

58. Give back.

59. He does not define your self-worth. Stop letting him.

60. Life is uncertain. Tomorrow is not guaranteed; don’t take it for granted.

61. Your faith in everything you know will be tested. Push forward.

62. Be carefree, not careless.

63. It’s okay to cry.

64. You will fall, both literally and figuratively. Get back up.

65. Tequila is a bad idea, as is getting back together with an ex.

66. Fad diets never work.

67. Be gracious in all that you do.

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Categories: Blog

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Categories: Funnies

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For those days when you just want to take a nice hot bath and set a dick on fire…

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Categories: Funnies

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Honestly, these are all nothing but a joke…. Though, I could see myself using the Potato-crotch She-Hitler photo….

 

1. A nun discovering the joys of the ocean:

A nun discovering the joys of the ocean:

 

2. Two crash test dummies in a forbidden romance:

Two crash test dummies in a forbidden romance:

 

3. A woman haunted by the ghost of hamburgers past:

A woman haunted by the ghost of hamburgers past:

See the rest of this gallery »

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